Have you ever wondered why we don’t talk about death as much as the Stoics did? It’s funny, isn’t it? In a world where life is often viewed as more fragile than we care to admit, we don’t think about dying every day. In fact, we try to avoid the conversation altogether. The funny thing is, in the times of the Stoics, life was way more uncertain. People died from simple illnesses, infections, or even a small cut. Children died at birth, and you could be taken out by something as unpredictable as it seemed from something as little as a random sneeze.
Yet, it was the Stoics, who felt the need to remind themselves about death — every day.
You might be wondering, “Why did they need the reminder so much more than we do? After all, we live in a time when medicine, technology, and safety are at their peak.” Here’s the kicker: they didn’t, I think we’ve got it backwards. They saw death as part of life, not just as some singular event waiting for us at the end. Back then the reminders were everywhere in society: in their art, in their jewelry, in their speeches. It was woven into the very fabric of their daily lives.
A Different Way to Live
Imagine this: you’re a general, fresh off a victorious battle, and now you are thrust into a celebration parade. People are cheering your name, your soldiers are proud to just stand beside you, and you’re feeling on top of the world. And then — there’s a slave standing behind you, whispering in your ear, “Look behind you, remember, you are just a man.” How bizarre is that? It’s not some fairy tale, though. It’s an ancient tradition of the Roman generals to have a slave remind them of their mortality, especially in the face of triumph.
Why? Because they understood something crucial that we often forget, life is fleeting. And to truly live it — to truly appreciate it — they had to remind themselves that death was always there, lurking right behind them. It was part of the equation. That whispering reminder wasn’t meant to be morbid or depressing. It was meant to keep them grounded, to keep them humble.
Now think about our modern world. When was the last time you saw a piece of art that boldly displayed a skull or death? When was the last time you wore a ring with a little skull on it or had a reminder of your mortality staring at you in the face every day? We’ve taken most of that out of our lives. We’ve replaced death with curated Instagram posts, influencers, and the daily grind. And it’s strange, because, with all the advancements we have in healthcare and technology, we’ve somehow become more disconnected from the reality of life’s impermanence. We’ve got a better chance of living longer, but we seem to forget how precious time is.
Are We Doing It Wrong?
You ever stop and think, “How fortunate am I to live in a time like this?” We have so much safety, so much convenience, and yet — how often do we appreciate it? So often, we get caught up in our little worries, our schedules, our ambitions — and we forget that we’re constantly moving, very fast I might add, toward an end. But here’s the thing: thinking of death as a single, distant event isn’t the point of memento more. Memento Mori, “Remember you must die,” is a Stoic reminder to reflect on our mortality so we can live each day with purpose and presence.
The point is this: life isn’t guaranteed. Sure, it’s easy to say, “I’ll get to that tomorrow,” but what are we missing out on today because we’re always deferring our dreams, our connections, our passions? We die a little bit every day in the sense that time is constantly passing us by, whether we’re ready for it or not. Every minute we waste, every moment we don’t appreciate it, is another piece of our lives gone.
It’s not just about waiting for death. It’s about noticing the time that’s already passed. That’s what the Stoics really understood. They weren’t morbid about death — they were practical. They knew that the key to living a good life wasn’t in ignoring death, but in recognizing how precious the time we have truly is. It’s about embracing that reminder, letting it fuel us, and using it to make our actions meaningful and stay in the present moment.
How to Start Seeing the Value
So, here’s a little challenge for you: Instead of thinking about death as this distant, singular moment, think of it as your constant companion. Not in a morbid way — but in a way that brings meaning to each decision, every interaction, every hour you spend.
Start small. Maybe add a little reminder for yourself. Put a quote on your wall or in your phone — something that reminds you that time is slipping away. It doesn’t have to be a skull, grim reaper, or morbid saying; it could be a simple note like, “What am I doing with this moment?”
Then, when you start to feel the weight of life’s demands, ask yourself: Am I using my time in a way that matters? Or am I letting the clock tick away while I wait for the perfect moment that never comes?
In Conclusion
Maybe, just maybe, we need that reminder more than we think. Not as a heavy weight on our shoulders, but as a spark to wake us up. While we’re not walking through life with skulls on our tableware or listening to a slave whisper in our ear, we do have the power to live consciously aware of the time we have been given.
And that, I believe, is the true gift of Memento Mori. It’s not about fearing death. It’s about waking up to the life we have before it slips away.